MID-TERM EXAM TIPS FOR PARENTS AND STUDENTS
Marion Kohler: Principal Abbotts College JHB South • May 26, 2022
As parents or guardians, most of us work long, exhausting days. We understand that with the price of food, petrol, school fees etcetera, work is a given – if we are fortunate enough to be employed - and this is not something we are ever going to change. The downside is that hard work often leaves us with very little time for anything else. As parents, we often feel guilty that we seem to have so little time with our children. Added to this, we often put pressure on our children to somehow perform, using their report cards as a measure of their effort and intelligence.
Many parents trust that teachers are in control simply because they don’t themselves have the extra bandwidth to step into academic support mode after a long day at work. Additionally, we often resort to pressuring our children, whether it be through threats, bribes, or encouragement to circumvent a bad report after examinations. Let’s be honest, not all children are those gorgeous self-starters, in the Top 20 at school who just seem to ‘get on with it’ and never seem to need the parental pressures that so many of us have to use on our children.
Most schools’ second term comprise those mid-year examinations where this pressure can bring added anxiety and chaos into a household. The pressure starts to mount when you do not see the evidence of studying.
As a principal, at Abbotts College JHB South, I see the despair when the report card comes and parents are called in to visit the deputy or principal about their child’s results.
But my advice today to parents is to practice love and patience. Young teenagers are still developing. Their adolescent brains, especially those going through puberty, where cognitive, emotional, and social maturation are being influenced by hormones, have a tremendous effect on the development of executive functioning in the brain. This functioning develops in the prefrontal cortex which is the area responsible for decision-making, planning, prioritizing, strategizing, coordinating thought and emotion, delaying gratification, inhibiting impulses and inappropriate behavior.
Research over the past 15 years has shown that these areas do not function as optimally as those of adults. The limbic system and other parts of the brain do not fully mature until the early 20s. Putting extreme pressure and anxiety onto a teenager to bring home the perfect report card will negatively affect them. We need to be realistic about their abilities and remember that one examination is never a determinant for success in life. We have to encourage them to perform to the best of their ability but not at the expense of our relationship with them or the damage parents can inflict on their self-esteem and identity formation.
Having said that there are some ways in which we can support our teenagers, by doing the following:
- Download the Examination timetable in advance and ensure it is visible in your house where you and your child can monitor the calendar.
- Assist your child in coming up with a study timetable (many schools may conduct workshops to assist with this).
- Ensure the scope of study for all subjects is downloaded and available in advance (most schools will give this out at least 4-6 weeks before examinations commence).
- Ensure your child has approached teachers early on if there are concepts that are challenging and need further clarification.
- If your child is struggling with finishing tests on time, does not get through work fast enough, reads very slowly, or does not write neatly, it may be a good idea to get him/her tested by an Educational Psychologist who can assist with applying for concessions.
- Buy A4 feint and margin books for every subject so that note-taking is in one place for the full year and not on pieces of paper that are scattered around the house.
- Ensure your child has a quiet place to study, with a desk and necessary stationery (‘passive studying’ on a bed is ineffective – separate, if possible, the spaces where they sleep and where they work)
- Eliminate distractions and lay down the rules during examination periods (especially cellphones, social media, gaming).
- Ensure your child continues with healthy pursuits such as exercising and sport; and that they eat as healthily as possible.
- Do not always believe your teen! Be aware, switched on, available, supportive yet receptive to how and what they are studying.
In my opinion, a little extrinsic motivation during study time for teenagers can be effective. Many are not intrinsically motivated to study and there are pros and cons to rewarding and incentivizing your teen. You know your child best and what they are capable of. Giving them goals and possible rewards, without undue pressure that could create anxiety may be the catalyst for your child to motivate them. We have to inculcate a sense of pride in what they do and encourage effort and autonomy. With so much riding on matric examinations, skills need to be developed early on in the junior grades in preparation for these. This does not happen overnight but with patience, assistance, organization, and loving guidance our children can overcome examination anxiety and learn the tools necessary for examination success.
Every young person has a unique story, but in the wrong school, that story might never be realised and celebrated. The right school, however, ensures that each story is heard and every student lives up to their full potential. Enter personalised learning: Environments where young people are seen, supported and encouraged to explore who they are and want to be in the world. When parents and students walk into a school which prides itself on being student-centered, they immediately feel this difference. In my 30 years in education, I’ve been continually inspired by what young people can achieve when given the right tools, space, and support. Success is about so much more than academic results, it also includes emotional and social growth. When students are free to express themselves, they experience deeper learning, and greater personal well-being and self-confidence. This freedom builds communication skills, sparks creativity, and fosters critical thinking, developing them into confident and capable young adults. TAILORING EDUCATION TO INDIVIDUAL NEEDS When schools shift to personalised learning, something transformative happens: Students stop feeling like just another face in the crowd and instead, they become active participants in their education. With tools like MAP assessments, teachers gain valuable insights into where a student excels and where they need support. This data informs learning plans tailored to each student’s pace and style. Some students benefit from short videos or visual aids, while others prefer hands-on tasks or one-on-one support. Platforms like Khan Academy and adaptive learning apps help teachers meet these diverse needs with precision. This model creates a more dynamic learning environment, where a struggling student can revisit a topic until it makes sense. Advanced learners are able to move on to more challenging material without waiting. Each student progresses at their own pace, in a way that works for them. BEYOND ACADEMICS The benefits of personalised learning go well beyond the classroom. Students build emotional resilience when their needs are recognised and met. Social development naturally follows as they take ownership of their learning and grow in confidence. Personalised learning doesn’t demand perfection, but invites growth. Schools become places of discovery, where students study not only the curriculum, but also discover who they are and what they’re capable of. If you are wondering whether high schools can change lives by embracing individuality, just watch a student light up when talking about a subject they love. Look at the learners who feel safe enough to speak up, take risks, and aim higher. UNLOCKING TRUE POTENTIAL When schools see students not as numbers, but as individuals with dreams and potential, education becomes truly impactful. Personalised learning is not a trend, it is a return to what learning should be: human, responsive, and empowering. As educators, parents, and communities, we must create environments where every student feels valued and every voice matters. Because when we embrace students for who they really are, we unlock the door to who they’re meant to become.
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In the wake of the mid-year exams, there is much that parents and students can learn from their results, which should be used to consider the way forward, an education expert says. “I was fortunate to have one child who was very diligent as a scholar, starting to study way ahead of the exams, even from the lower grades, using her midterm break to study year after year. She never had to be asked to go and study and her study breaks were actual breaks from studying,” says Mignonne Gerli, Principal: Abbotts College Pretoria East. “This was not true for all my children. Another of my children thought that studying the day before the exam would do just fine. I remember always catching this child on a study break or as she had just finished studying. I can confidently say that I never, in five years, caught her studying. You can imagine the fights and stress (felt by me) during this time.” As parents, we know how important it is to achieve good results at school. Prior to Grade 11 and 12, students already need to have developed a mature and diligent work ethic. “We know which doors can be opened and which firmly shut, based on your school results,” says Gerli. “For this reason, we fight the good fight which means that exam periods can be extremely stressful and highly unpleasant in many households. We try various methods to cajole our less than diligent children to put effort into their studies and in some cases loathe the day that the reports are published.” Whether exam time is a breeze for you as a parent, with your model child, or absolute hell, with your sweet/funny/kind but less committed child, the end of the exams and results need to be reflected upon. And for those who suffered through the past exams, it is time to come up with different strategies for the next set of exams. “Reflection for those who appear to prepare well for exams, will take the form of considering whether their study methods were effective or if they need help with the way in which they study.” “During these exams, I watched my one granddaughter study. “Not once did I catch her on a break on the days she was with us. What I also noticed was that she studies by copying out the textbook, not something that can be remedied when she is shoulder deep into the exams. This is not an effective way to study and she will definitely need to be taught better study methods in preparation for her next exams.” What have you as a parent noticed about your child’s study methods? Can you assist or will you need a professional to help with better study methods? “Students who achieved excellent results for their exams can reflect on why they did so well and how they can build on this going forward. “The students who put little to no effort into their preparation for the exams, will need guidance and assistance from their parents to try remedy their approach to their work. There needs to be an open, calm discussion about why they did not study for the exams and what would motivate them to study and put effort into their preparation for their next exam session.” Approaches could include: Negative consequences for poor effort, such as having their phones taken away for a period of time, grounding them or taking away certain privileges. Offering a reward for effort, this may be in the form of a cash incentive for improved results or achieving a certain mark per subject, it could be purchasing them something they would like, it could be additional privileges. Reasoning with them, explaining the importance of developing a mature work ethic and achieving good results. This is something teenagers struggle to fully comprehend so some true-life examples of success and failure of family members and friends, when it comes to financial and career success, may be useful here. Go through university courses they may be interested in with them and show them what is required to qualify for the courses. I have found that many teenagers have no idea what is required to gain access to a career they wish to pursue. A reality check is sometimes all they need. Help them think about their future and what they want to achieve in life. It needs to be concrete as having a goal is a great motivator for hard work. Usually, it is the students who have no real vision for their future and what they would like to achieve who struggle to motivate themselves to study. They simply don’t get why it’s important and of value. “Exam time can be very stressful, but taking some time to consider how to make the next exam session less so, and working towards establishing a positive trajectory, can make all the difference for the future,” says Gerli.
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Resilience, the ability to bounce back from challenges and adapt in the face of adversity, is a critical skill for teenagers navigating the complexities of modern life. As parents, your role in fostering resilience can profoundly influence your child's ability to manage stress, overcome obstacles, and thrive both academically and personally. From an educator's perspective, here are key strategies to help build resilience in your teenager. 1. Encourage a Growth Mindset A growth mindset, the belief that abilities and intelligence can be developed through dedication and hard work, is foundational to resilience. Praise your teenager for their effort rather than innate ability. For instance, instead of saying, "You're so smart," try, "I'm impressed by how hard you worked on this." This shift encourages persistence and a willingness to embrace challenges. 2. Foster Strong Relationships Supportive relationships are crucial for building resilience. Encourage your teenager to build and maintain healthy relationships with peers, family members, and mentors. Spend quality time together as a family, engage in open communication, and create an environment where your teenager feels safe to express their feelings and experiences. 3. Teach Problem-Solving Skills Equip your teenager with problem-solving skills to manage difficulties independently. When they face a challenge, guide them through the process of identifying the problem, brainstorming potential solutions, evaluating the pros and cons of each option, and implementing a plan of action. This practice not only builds resilience but also instils a sense of competence and confidence. 4. Promote Self-Care and Healthy Habits A healthy body supports a resilient mind. Encourage your teenager to adopt regular exercise, balanced nutrition, and adequate sleep. Discuss the importance of relaxation techniques such as mindfulness, meditation, or even simple hobbies that they enjoy. Prioritising self-care helps teenagers manage stress and maintain emotional balance. 5. Model Resilient Behaviour Children often learn by observing their parents. Demonstrate resilient behaviour in your own life. Share your experiences of overcoming difficulties, discuss the emotions involved, and explain how you managed to navigate the tough times. Your teenager will learn valuable lessons about resilience through your example. 6. Encourage Independence and Responsibility Allow your teenager to take on age-appropriate responsibilities and make their own decisions. This autonomy fosters a sense of control and competence. Please encourage them to set personal goals and take steps towards achieving them. Please support them in facing the natural consequences of their choices, as these experiences are crucial for learning and growth. 7. Provide a Safe Environment to Fail Failure is an inevitable part of life and a powerful teacher. Create an environment where failure is seen as a learning opportunity rather than a disaster. Encourage your teenager to take risks and try new things, reassuring them that it is okay to fail and that you are there to support them in learning from these experiences. 8. Develop Emotional Literacy Help your teenager develop emotional literacy, the ability to recognise, understand, and manage their emotions. Engage in conversations about feelings, encourage them to articulate their emotions, and validate their experiences. Teaching them techniques for managing negative emotions, such as deep breathing or journaling, can also be beneficial. 9. Set Realistic Expectations Set realistic and achievable expectations for your teenager. Unrealistic expectations can lead to excessive stress and a sense of failure. Please work with your teenager to set attainable goals and celebrate their progress. This approach fosters a sense of achievement and motivates them to keep moving forward despite setbacks. 10. Seek Professional Support When Needed Parents must identify when their child needs professional help. If your teenager is struggling with significant stress, anxiety, or depression, do not hesitate to seek support from school counsellors, therapists, or other mental health professionals. Early intervention can make a substantial difference in their ability to build and maintain resilience. Building resilience is a journey, not a destination. By employing these strategies, you can support your teenager in developing the skills and mindset needed to navigate life’s challenges with confidence and strength. As educators, we see firsthand the positive impact of resilience on students’ well-being and success, and we are committed to partnering with you in nurturing resilient, capable young adults.
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