Nonconforming to social Norms 

Sedhoo Padayachee, Principal at Abbotts College Northcliff • August 12, 2019
A row of wooden chess pieces on a wooden chess board.

Human beings are conformists by nature. We tend to do things the way most people do to fit in and be accepted by society. Conformity is in our genes and even when we do not fully agree with some of society’s norms, we generally toe the line as it is the safer thing to do. We seek approval, avoid rejection, and are guided by social norms.

However, conformists too sometimes deviate from the straight and narrow in order to escape societal pressures. This practice nowadays is considered normal. Nonconforming to social norms is a continuous deviation from the way things are normally done. It is, for instance, where you dye your hair pink and wear it this way not just because its cancer awareness week or, a man who will only wear takkies even if he is dressing up in a suit.

Conformists ironically, very often appreciate non-conformity albeit primarily for amusement or entertainment purposes and not necessarily, because it is something they would do themselves. The most common example of this is our appreciation for artists in the music industry. 50 Cent, Lady Gaga, Cardi B and Nicki Minaj are very unconventional artists, all very successful with millions of passionate fans. Yet not too many of their millions of followers will necessarily conduct themselves the way they do. It is easier and safer just to watch and admire from a distance. This too, I suppose, offers some kind of escape from the humdrum of a conventional lifestyle.

Nonconformity must never be confused with breaking the law or disobeying the rules and regulations of an institution or a public space. Being late for work or school is not nonconformity; it is plainly inconsiderate and ill-mannered. Smoking in a non-smoking area is simply selfish and unacceptable. Swearing at the top of your voice in a public park or the schoolyard is improper and inappropriate. Talking at assembly or at the movies is impolite. Always have a sense of occasion and behave fittingly.

There is always a time and place for you to act and behave in a manner that you please without contravening the law. For example, if you don’t subscribe to school uniforms then find a school that will accommodate that wish. Abbotts College offers that option. As a student, you are able to display your individuality like nowhere else. Individuality is always appreciated, admired and respected. It is taken as a breath of fresh air that teachers look forward to and embrace in the classroom. Again, however, while individuality is aligned with being a non-conformist, it is never confused with what is right and what is wrong.

Academic outcomes
July 20, 2026
Do alternative schools deliver strong academic results? An honest comparison of outcomes between independent and mainstream schools and what the data shows.
Private school enrolment
July 20, 2026
Not sure how to compare private schools? Use this practical evaluation guide to assess quality, culture, academics, and value before you commit.
IEB exam
June 19, 2026
Not sure how the IEB exam system works? Discover what the IEB assesses, how results are calculated, and what it means for your child’s future in plain, simple terms.
Career planning
June 19, 2026
Not sure how to guide your teen through career planning? Get practical tips on strengths, subject choices & career paths after matric.
Class size
June 12, 2026
Discover how small class sizes benefit students academically, emotionally and socially. Learn why class size is one of the most important factors when choosing a school
Private vs public
June 12, 2026
Weighing up private vs public school in South Africa? Explore the honest differences in curriculum, fees, class size and outcomes to make the best choice for your child
Choosing a private school
May 21, 2026
Our complete 2026 guide covers curricula, fees, school culture, campus visits, applications, and everything parents need to make the right choice for their child.
Three people sit at an outdoor table, writing on papers in a garden setting.
May 20, 2026
Wondering whether the IEB or NSC is better for your child? Our 2026 guide breaks down the key differences in curriculum, assessment, university recognition, and outcomes so you can make the right call.
Scrabble tiles arranged on a white surface to spell the words
March 20, 2026
Discover the essential transition skills universities don’t teach—from time management to independence. Learn how to prepare for life beyond academics and succeed in the real world.
A person sits on the floor by a window, curled up with their head down, wearing a red long-sleeved shirt and dark pants.
March 20, 2026
Support teen mental health with practical strategies for students and parents in South Africa. Learn how to manage stress, recognise warning signs, and build emotional resilience.
Show More